Sunday, October 21, 2012

Words that Changed my Life--the Bad Ones

This is the third part in a series on Words that Changed my Life. Read more in parts 1 and 2.

You and they.

They’re the bad words that have been laced throughout my years in Indonesia. Sometimes shouted. Sometimes whispered. Always lying. Almost always convincing. Until recently.

They go something like this. You are not loved. You are too much trouble. You are invisible. You are no good. 

They, however, are beautiful.  They are wanted. They have it all—or at least what you want. 

And sometimes, at their deadliest, they merge. They judge you .They don’t want you. They don’t  even see you.

It’s that deadly game that starts with my own insecurity, is layered next with the amazing talents, gifts, looks, popularity of friends, acquaintances, teammates, strangers—anyone who seems more important than I feel. Next comes my own jealousy, topped with more dark thoughts that are intent on destroying both me and them.

You’ll never have what they have. They probably don’t deserve what they have. You are no good. And neither are they.

And it tumbles down from there.

But for the past year, I’ve been talking back to the words. Calling out the lies. Searching for the truth. Cheering on the good things—especially when they happen to other people.

I’ve been focusing on the Him, not the You or the They. Enjoying what He says about Me. That I’m valuable. That I have been given my own set of gifts, my own good things. That I’m called to be part of Him and His big plans. That We can believe these truths together, choosing better words than You or They. 

Words like love, not jealousy,  hope, not despair, blessings, not curses.

What about you? Do you hear the accusations? Do the lies prey on your thoughts? Does the envy destroy your friendships? Will you join with me in searching for freedom once and for all?

photo credit, crdotx

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